Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it. Matthew 7:13-14
Jesus of Nazareth was, among other things, an esoteric moral philosopher, meaning he spoke primarily about the subject of morality in statements designed to locate their intended audience through obscurity and confusion.
And the disciples came and said to Him, “Why do You speak to them in parables?” He answered and said to them, “Because it has been given to you to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it has not been given. For whoever has, to him more will be given, and he will have abundance; but whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken away from him. Therefore I speak to them in parables, because seeing they do not see, and hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand. And in them the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled, which says:‘Hearing you will hear and shall not understand, And seeing you will see and not perceive; For the hearts of this people have grown dull. Their ears are hard of hearing, And their eyes they have closed, Lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears, Lest they should understand with their hearts and turn, So that I should heal them.’But blessed are your eyes for they see, and your ears for they hear; for assuredly, I say to you that many prophets and righteous men desired to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. Matthew 13:10-17
I think you could quite reasonably be confused by this. It's a fine explanation, I suppose. He had to speak in such a way that even very patient and learned scribes would not understand. But it doesn't justify it (not that this is the appropriate role or posture to take with the text).
Which leaves us with the question they started with: why speak esoterically? Aren't we supposed to talk to people about this? Doesn't making things hard to understand impede that, even for the few people that do get it?
Somewhat frustratingly, we are advised against being too helpful on this front, notably:
But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers. And do not call anyone on earth your father, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. Nor are you to be called instructors, for you have one Instructor, the Christ. Matthew 23:8-10
and
Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly. James 3:1
But I'd like to share the parts where I am approaching understanding. I think it's hard to avoid recommending discussion of the text, and while I'm not qualified to teach, it might be helpful to point to the guideposts already present.
The narrow gate seems to be related to the desires of our heart. Consider:
“Ask and it will be given to you. Search and you will find. Knock and the door will be opened for you. The one who asks will always receive; the one who is searching will always find, and the door is opened to the man who knocks.” Matthew 7:7-8
and
“Not everyone who calls me Lord will enter God’s kingdom. The only people who will enter are those who do what my Father in heaven wants. On that last Day many will call me Lord. They will say, ‘Lord, Lord, by the power of your name we spoke for God. And by your name we forced out demons and did many miracles.’ Then I will tell those people clearly, ‘Get away from me, you people who do wrong. I never knew you.’ Matthew 7:21-23
This creates a pretty interesting synthesis, don't you think?
Thesis: knock and it will be open to you.
Antithesis: only the people who do the will of His Father will be allowed in.
Synthesis: I'm uncertain. Can't someone knock and not otherwise do the will of their Father in heaven?
Either the only thing your Father in heaven wants you to do is knock/seek, and the people saying 'Lord, Lord' are doing it wrong (plausible, they're spending all their time bragging), or there's a more general principle that people will get the fruits of their desires, but often those desires are quite bad (also extremely plausible).
At the very least we can be assured that many who devote their lives to their faith will not pass through the narrow gate, if those people working miracles in the name of God are any indication at all. This is what should set you thinking -- if people can take things extremely seriously and not make any progress, what more specific approach should I be taking?
The very tricky part is, I don't think I currently want to do the will of my Father in Heaven (I want to want to, is that enough?). I don't know what His will is, and I'm saturated with worries about my own suffering, about how, if I'm only good for how I help others, I will be purposeless for all eternity once His will is done. The only thing that would be left of me, when God's will is done, would be my selfish desires. When I have given all I can for Him, would those be disregarded or destroyed? Why would I be allowed in Heaven, if I am good only for how I help others? I'm not so lost that my selfishness is all I think of, but I do worry about it. I've seen how sacrificing for others makes me ugly in the sight of people who proudly claim the love of God for themselves, where I am left uncertain. Perhaps they would enjoy Heaven while I wash their feet and wait upon their needs. I fear giving everything I have for others will leave me totally alone. Insufficient, because I didn't understand how to find the narrow gate, my last hope missing and permanently lost to me. No one else cares truly about my own suffering, God is distant, and His love, however powerful it might be, does not reach me where I am lost. It never has. But I would like to keep trying.
I genuinely do not know if this is enough to find the narrow gate. I hope it is.
Isaiah was right about me hearing things and not understanding them, at least.
Perhaps I've found some hints. Let me share some of them, in case they can complete the puzzle for someone else. I might not be worthy of the Kingdom of Heaven, but I think many people would enjoy it, and I'd like to help.
“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.” Luke 6:27-31
Look, this seems pretty open and shut. It seems unlikely a follower of Christ would have things on a long-term basis, because if someone asks for or takes something they let it go.
Obviously you should not covet things, this is a pretty simple application of that principle. But let's expand our scope slightly.
No one can serve two masters: Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. Matthew 6:24
The most obvious thing here is, if you want to love God, you should hate money, and if you want to be devoted to God you should despise money. I think that's a pretty straightforward reading, although I imagine it more as a consequence of love and devotion than a prerequisite.
A subtler idea here is, does it matter which I choose? Should I love God and hate money, or be devoted to God and despise money? For the sake of my own mental organization, I'll say that the first is an Aesthetic-driven faith, where you have a sense of what you like and God is an ally, and the second is a interpersonal faith, defined by your relationship with God.
Unfortunately, I've failed to have the kind of direct experiences many report with their faith. I've had many moments of intense feeling, but I'm unable to discern what to do with that. Truthfully, I'm not even entirely sure I understand what people mean when they say they have a personal relationship with God. Perhaps they mean they're personal in prayer.
Devotion is a tricky thing. Perhaps your journey is different. I think I have devotion in the moments where my most foolish desires are strongest. In those moments my aesthetics fail, my desire for goodness waivers, and devotion is all I can offer. I wish I was better. But for the most part I think my faith is driven by love. I want to be a good person mostly because I can imagine what that might be. Cooperating with that kind of person seems more important than anything. But I remain largely disappointed in how distant that prospect seems.
There's no hint that either option is bad, but I do think the dichotomy is posed because it's important. The two patterns are so similar that few would bother distinguishing them in the first place.
So whether out of love or devotion to God (or, out of hate or while despising money), the key is, give and do good. There are two potential limiting factors addressed prominently. Firstly, family, and secondly, poverty. See:
“You have a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to observe your own traditions! For Moses said, ‘Honor your father and mother,’ and, ‘Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death.’ But you say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is Corban (that is, devoted to God)— then you no longer let them do anything for their father or mother. Thus you nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things like that.” Mark 7:9-13
Which is to say, do not set aside money to eventually devote to Holy purposes and use that as an excuse to not help your parents. Arguably, it is a somewhat poor reason to avoid helping anyone, but Corban, and the advance dedication of material goods to God, is not a system I'm super familiar with, so I don't know how to understand this remark.
This is limited by one thing it seems is demonstrably fine as a reason to not help someone.
When [the beggar] saw Peter and John about to enter, he asked them for money. Peter looked straight at him, as did John. Then Peter said, “Look at us!” So the man gave them his attention, expecting to get something from them. Then Peter said, “Silver or gold I do not have, but what I do have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk.” Acts 3:3-6
I wish to be as cool as Peter is in that moment. Worth giving everything away for.
Three things stand out: that you do not have to give people precisely what they ask for, that you can decline to give people money on account of not having it, and whatever goodwill offering you have will be well received. I've not experienced miraculous healing working this way, but I don't speak for Jesus to strangers.
The reason I list giving first among principles is that it's presented as preparatory. See John the Baptist:
"And even now the ax is laid to the root of the trees. Therefore every tree which does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.” So the people asked him, saying, “What shall we do then?” He answered and said to them, “He who has two tunics, let him give to him who has none; and he who has meat, let him do likewise.” Luke 3:9-11
The voice crying out in the wilderness, 'Prepare the way of the Lord and make his paths straight', seemed pretty keen that his only bit of universal advice was, give, if you have extra.
To whom should you give? All who ask, but if nobody is asking, ponder:
You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:14-16
I pondered for a long time trying to figure out how my relatively modest good works might cause someone to glorify their Father in heaven. I think the trick is to do good things where they have no idea where they come from. So they don't thank you, they thank God. Plus, you aren't the light of your neighborhood, or town, or even country. You're the light the of the world. If you are set apart from others, like the city set on the hill, you will provide to all who are in the house. When you open yourself up to thinking, I want to help strangers, and help the best I can, you're going to see there are some pretty amazing opportunities.
Also consider:
When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ Matthew 25:31-40
Least among us could mean a number of things. Global poverty provides an obvious guess, and the people in prison another very good one. So those are good places to help, with extremely high certainty. And the six core examples he uses are good too: the material needs of food, water and clothes, and the social needs, care for the sick, visits in prison (although take note that prison was very different back then) and hospitality to strangers. Those six are absolutely bulletproof in my book, but they're all contextualized by the "least among" audience. Generally, serve those in greatest need. It's least among us, not lesser.
I took pride in my gifts. In hindsight, it was a somewhat silly thing, as glad as I was (and am) that I helped. This is merely preparation for The Way. Many still do not find it.
But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me. Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light. Because I have sinned against him, I will bear the Lord’s wrath, until he pleads my case and upholds my cause. He will bring me out into the light; I will see his righteousness. Micah 7:7-9
I have little to offer on the subject of hope. I wish I was more practiced at it. In almost every way I can describe my life is quite substantially worse than it was when I first became a Christian. That I have not abandoned the endeavor speaks to some amount of hope, but that is perhaps the limit of my bragging.
The Micah quote is the best I have.
Some people believe their justice will be vengeance from God. I am far too ashamed to want anything but to bear whatever burdens might be placed on others for their trespasses against me. Let them enjoy their full rewards. I have grown sad in the waiting, and fear I deserve very little anyway. Let me take their burden so that they might see the fruition of their hope. I was never good at that part anyway. My cause is to help others, and someday that work will be done. My case is merely that others deserve more than the tragedies they've seen, and someday that case will be made. I will be tormented by my failures, I suspect, and don't think any particular external influence would be necessary for that.
But for those optimistic in their performance as servants of God, there is a very concrete hope: that of life after the resurrection.
What's it all for? A fair question, and one without much of a solid answer.
The first important thing to do is to distinguish between the kingdom of Heaven (or kingdom of God) and whatever comes after the resurrection. Much talk about life and destruction should be seen as independent of the kingdom of Heaven -- they simply are two distinct (yet related) ideas in the discussions of Jesus.
I'm going to suggest something to the effect of, the narrow gate is one way of entering the resurrection, and it is defined by a certain attitude and character leading up to it. What lays beyond the gate also lays beyond my comprehension. This seems fine -- the kingdom of Heaven is at hand, and that alone has strong support for being worthwhile even without a resurrection.
Notably:
“The Kingdom of Heaven is like a treasure that a man discovered hidden in a field. In his excitement, he hid it again and sold everything he owned to get enough money to buy the field. “Again, the Kingdom of Heaven is like a merchant on the lookout for choice pearls. When he discovered a pearl of great value, he sold everything he owned and bought it! “Again, the Kingdom of Heaven is like a fishing net that was thrown into the water and caught fish of every kind. When the net was full, they dragged it up onto the shore, sat down, and sorted the good fish into crates, but threw the bad ones away. That is the way it will be at the end of the world. The angels will come and separate the wicked people from the righteous, throwing the wicked into the fiery furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth. Do you understand all these things?” “Yes,” they said, “we do.” Then he added, “Every teacher of religious law who becomes a disciple in the Kingdom of Heaven is like a homeowner who brings from his storeroom new gems of truth as well as old.” Matthew 13:44-51
An important thing I'd like to highlight here is that there is one element shared between the kingdom of Heaven and the end of the world. The wicked will be separated from the righteous -- think of Lazarus:
There was a rich man who was dressed in purple and fine linen and lived in luxury every day. At his gate was laid a beggar named Lazarus, covered with sores and longing to eat what fell from the rich man’s table. Even the dogs came and licked his sores. The time came when the beggar died and the angels carried him to Abraham’s side. The rich man also died and was buried, and he went to the place of the dead. There, in torment, he saw Abraham in the far distance with Lazarus at his side. The rich man shouted, ‘Father Abraham, have some pity! Send Lazarus over here to dip the tip of his finger in water and cool my tongue. I am in anguish in these flames.’ But Abraham said to him, ‘Son, remember that during your lifetime you had everything you wanted, and Lazarus had nothing. So now he is here being comforted, and you are in anguish. And besides, there is a great chasm separating us. No one can cross over to you from here, and no one can cross over to us from there.' Then the rich man said, ‘Please, Father Abraham, at least send him to my father’s home. For I have five brothers, and I want him to warn them so they don’t end up in this place of torment.’ But Abraham said, ‘Moses and the prophets have warned them. Your brothers can read what they wrote.’ “The rich man replied, ‘No, Father Abraham! But if someone is sent to them from the dead, then they will repent of their sins and turn to God.’ But Abraham said, ‘If they won’t listen to Moses and the prophets, they won’t be persuaded even if someone rises from the dead.’ Luke 16:19-31
I included the whole parable here because it's the only human-level account of what the resurrection might look like.
There's a lot to unpack there, but notably, there are many people you will only be able to help in mortality, before the gulf is put between you and them. Good people who deserve your help, or people in even more desperate need of it, depending on which side you end up on.
Obviously, both the above quotes underscore that something very valuable is on offer with the kingdom of Heaven, and there is plausibly suffering available after the resurrection. Little else is known. But once you pass through whatever gate you do, in the resurrection, it is plausible there will be no way to cross the chasm to visit others.
I'd like to emphasize the time sensitive nature of the kingdom of Heaven more -- it isn't merely that some people will be beyond the reach of your help after the resurrection. You're asked to let your light shine to all those in the house, but you cannot delay:
Then the Kingdom of Heaven will be like ten virgins, who took their lamps, and went out to meet the bridegroom. Five of them were foolish, and five were wise. Those who were foolish, when they took their lamps, took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. Now while the bridegroom delayed, they all slumbered and slept. But at midnight there was a cry, "Behold! The bridegroom is coming! Come out to meet him!" Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps. The foolish said to the wise, "Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out." But the wise answered, saying, "What if there isn't enough for us and you? You go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves." While they went away to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the marriage feast, and the door was shut. Afterward the other virgins also came, saying, "Lord, Lord, open to us." But he answered, "Most certainly I tell you, I don't know you." Watch therefore, for you don't know the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming. Matthew 25:1-13
You have capacity to shine light into the darkness. If you have resources to buy things, make sure you buy whatever oil lets you do so. That preparation is essential. If you had the ability to shine light for others, but do not do so until you are specifically asked, you might miss out.
Relatedly:
And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’ Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’ But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’ Luke 12:16-20
One suggestion is, per Matthew 5:5, the meek will inherit what that man prepared for himself. But I suppose it doesn't quite matter.
Later in Luke 12 we are reminded to be ready for service and keep our lamps burning, specifically because it will be good for those people who are found vigilant when the master arrives.
This is all to say, the kingdom of Heaven is obviously very service-oriented, and while what lays beyond the narrow gate is unknown to me, there are many assurances that it is vastly better than the other paths. This seems plausible, as a matter of justice, but it's nice to have the assurance as well.